I woke in the very early hours of a morning this last week aware of a hollow feeling in my body. It felt like the whole of my chest cavity was empty. This for me is the feeling of scarcity. An emptiness. It is often also accompanied with fear and panic.
As I mentioned in the last blog, I have had the wonderful gift of knowing that I am loved. Sure, there are many times during the day I need to remind myself of this..but it is a feeling, not just an intellectual thought. And I am now able to access it pretty much any time.
As I was exploring the edges of this empty hollow feeling, I wondered what the feeling of abundance would be like. How I would register that in my body? Abundance…the certain knowing that I am being supplied with resources to meet my material existence…money, food, shelter, clothing, hot water, clean sheets, music, transportation, etc. (In distinction to abundance meaning over supply, and gluttony.) Am I able to register the feeling of abundance as I can now do with love?
At that time, in the dawn hours, the answer was no. I could not find it anywhere. Indeed, the sense of scarcity has so overwhelmed my life that I could not even find a trace of the feeling of abundance.
Scarcity comes in many forms and flavours…scarcity of time, money, knowledge, friends, play, thinness, sleep, health, love, sex, stuff….
Scarcity is the tool of advertising…”in order to feel good enough, you need X”
Its hard to escape the scarcity clutches, no matter how ‘rich’ you are. Indeed, I know many very financially wealthy people who are terrified of scarcity….of losing it all. So they cling to what they have, and it makes them mean spirited. They are as much in the clutches of scarcity as the person who worries about how to pay the bills.
Not being able to find a feeling of abundance is not going to continue as part of my identity. Or, to say it in the positive, my goal in this next stage of my life is to experience the inner feeling of abundance all of the time, no matter what is going on in the external world. Abundance is an inside job.
So the practice now is to cultivate the feeling of abundance in my body/being, no matter what the external circumstances.
The next morning, as I sat surveying the glorious view from my mothers home in the hills over the Gold Coast, I found a sense of abundance. Of fullness.
With the experience of being loved, it feels like I am held in the arms of many with love. Therefore its a kind of inflow and receiving.
With the feeling of abundance it is about an open heart and shining love out. Its a feeling of fullness, to the degree that I am able to give to others. Give out. It is from a cup running over. An outflow. While this surprised me in the first instance, on reflection it is not that strange. Of course we must feel full and able to give in order to feel abundance.
The paradox, and the challenge, is that we need to do this when the material world may be an empty larder. This is why it is a practice. And not just a random practice, but a daily, hourly, even sometimes minute by minute practice.
Our current world is in the grip of fear built around a scarcity epidemic. Most of it is simply not true. Even our over consumption of resources, food, and stuff is driven by scarcity. I am not enough, so I need more of this or that, endlessly, and still I am not enough. This scarcity meme is killing us. Literally. We are the most obese, over shopped, over medicated, over carelessly screwing our planet group of people to have walked the earth. And almost all of this behaviour has at its source, scarcity.
Its time we consciously, actively, persistently practiced abundance, every single day. Not just to save ourselves, but to save our planet.
Join me in the practice of presencing abundance in your body/being.
When you notice the grip of scarcity seize you,
*pause, take a breath, breath the air fully into your lungs. There is enough air.
*repeat..there is enough air..
*open your heart, release the emotional and physical contraction that will be occurring. The stinginess, shut down, lack of generosity.
*imagine light beaming out from your heart…going from your heart to fill the next galaxy. There is enough light. You are able to generate light at will.
*consciously give something away…anything from a smile, to a warm thought, to a compliment, to a cup of coffee…there is enough smiles, enough warm thoughts, enough compliments…these things are endlessly available.
*affirm “I am enough. There is enough.”
REPEAT, until your heart rate slows down, and the space inside is less empty.
2:23AM Integrity is the Essence
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