For the last two months I have been participating in a fabulous course, Calling in the One. To sign up to participate, I had to get over a few hurdles. Including the title of the course. I have never been a big one for finding a soul mate, or even having an intimate relationship. Evidenced by me being single for more time than I have been in relationship. However, after the massive inner deep dive I have been catapulted into over these last two years, it occurred to me that I would like to have a relationship. Not just any relationship, but a really fabulous one. A joyous, easy one. To do this I had to take a stand that this was possible, because everything I had held as true until this time was that relationships were hard. Having spent the last 25 years in a very committed relationship to myself and my own inner development, to participate in such an excellent course as the one created by Katherine Woodward Thomas and Claire Zammit required that I really trust their ability to have me grow in areas I had not considered before. And they have delivered. It has not been a flaky course, it has required a level of rigor and accountability that I love. While they say it is based on the the laws of attraction, these laws as I know them have been give such a bad new age rap of late, that for the most part I move as far away from anyone who says they teach the laws of attraction as possible. However ‘Calling in the One’ might be more truthfully titled ‘Calling in Your Best Self’, as “The One” is in fact, the highest potential of you. So it is not about getting more stuff, including a soul mate. It is about being more of you in your fullest way, shining your light, and as a consequence of this attracting the mate, and other things that are aligned with your truthful self. Part of the course has been to read Katherine’s book, “Calling in the One”, which I have been enjoying. One of the earlier exercises was to write the story of your life in fairy tale version, specifically focusing on your relationships.
I thought long and hard about sharing this, as it needs the context. However, I felt that you may relate…so here goes…please comment, laugh, share, or even do this for yourself. I found it illuminating.
Once upon a time there was a beautiful little girl who became an amazon warrior on a crusade for a new world that valued people, the earth, truth, and natural design.
As a child she roamed hills, climbed tress, and lived in a land that was not of earth. In this land there were gods – strong and certain of their path; beauty beyond description – forests, streams, skies. She was adored by her father. He lived to play at his work. Her mother was remote and responsible, the backbone of the family. Stoic, capable, reliable.
When she was 11 years old, she was brought to earth with a crash. She had no idea of its existence. She had no idea that people where critical of their bodies and each other. That they could be so cruel. She had no idea that life was so hard. So she knuckled down and worked hard..and harder, trying to fit. She soon forgot the world she came from, where life was beauty and grace and love.
As she got older, the world she came from got further and further away from her. She remembered it in poetry, or books, or movies. Flickers here and there, like lights from angel wings as they avoided discovery.
In the beginning men were very attracted to her. Many of the men were god like in their own way, either in their own beauty, or their stand in the world. But she really did not pay attention. There was something else calling her, something she could not find. For years she searched. The man she married had what she was looking for inside when she first met him…a deep connection to something…but he lost the connection, and it seemed, he lost himself. She was hoping that he would be her guide to help her get back home. Maybe he was, in his own way, as she fathered an amazing girl child with him, and this child was an angel.
Thinking there was something deeply wrong with her, she nearly married a man who was so alien to her essence. He saw her as an object, a trophy. He was so disconnected from soul that when she finally came to her senses, three weeks before the marriage ceremony, her feelings of shame at her weakness for choosing him lasted many years before she could forgive herself for straying so far from her own beauty and value.
At one time she also met an angel, Joseph, who was struggling to fulfill his earthly existence. But he opened her heart, and in his arms she felt beautiful. His very whisper made her weak at the knees. But he was not long of earth, and left to return to his angel kingdom.
Then there were long periods of solitude. She spent her days in work, raising her child, and bearing the burden of being a single parent. Life felt hard. Her home was so far from her. She felt a deep sense of failure, of never being enough. There was something missing, something so important, but she couldn’t remember what it was. She had dedicated her life to finding it.
But she had to find it in herself. She remembered when she was a young child and a bird had died on the footpath in front of her. There were ants crawling over it. She picked it up to warm it and was told that it was dirty and wrong to do so. She remembered thinking that people where trying to take away her connection to what was true. The whole system of the world was conspiring to have her forget, and yet she would never let them take away the ability to love life, and nature, and what was whole and good. She was ferocious in her clinging to this vein of truth, so very deep, so very mysterious. Yet inch by inch, bit by bit, the threads were lost. Never lost completely, thank God.
Now, as she enters the age of the wise woman, the fierce wise woman, she has to bring the threads back together. What is required is courage, compassion, and an all encompassing belief in herself that can be felt around the world.
She has to be willing to step into her wisdom, her maturity, to give up the lost little girl feeling that has walked with her for so long. She has to stand in her magnificence, her value, her goddess. The whole of earth tremors when she stands in her glory. Men and women alike pause as she passes. She has found the key, and they know it and want it too.
As she stands in her fullness, the god who has been waiting for her for eons stirs, and travels towards her, across oceans. He has missed her. They have known each other from other lives, other times, both of them untangling the cords that have bound them to earth, to pain and suffering, to struggle. They have shed the cloak of time together, and meet, again, in an embrace that is home. The earth begins to breath again, for they are part of the warrior tribe who place goodness, truth and beauty as the centre of all existence. This tribe awakes, just as she awoke. They are coming together. They know the truth, and they have a contract that spans history to support the re-membering of the truth. The birds sing…
2:23AM Integrity is the Essence
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