As August 2009 comes to a close I sit here on a beautiful Friday afternoon on the Gold Coast in Queensland Australia and feel so blessed.
In the background I have the beautiful piano music of Michael Jones playing. The cool breeze is coming through the wide open doors that open onto my courtyard. There are birds calling in the background and the sun is shining in a blue cloudless sky. I have spent the morning working with some of my incredible clients and then engaged in a phone conversation that left every part of my physical and metaphysical form singing with the sheer joy and beauty of it.
My life has come so far, and I look back at all of the peaks and valleys and the journey to here with such awe and gratitude. This week alone has been one of such immensity and possibility it simply must go down in my life as resonating with infinite success.
In my early 20’s I had a burn for success. I was ambitious, I wanted to be the King of the World. (Queen of the World just doesn’t have the same ring to it!) The Universe had other plans. I see the perfection in everything that has unfolded. The relationships that came and went, and the pain and the joy they brought with them, the synchronous events that took me from one path to another, unexpectedly falling pregnant…the joys and disappointments, the places traveled…
While I truly get that everything matters, no event is small, or insignificant, there are events that seem to have such importance, where the color of the thread that has weaved the tapestry of my life has added a defining hue.
The move from Architecture school to Chiropractic college was one such event. While my work as a Chiropractor was limited in time, the study of the human body, of health and disease, has been a corner stone of my life. At the same time, the two disciplines are both a study of structure and form, a connection clear to me, but elusive to most. Structure and form and the understanding of the space between has been a constant on my path. Understanding energy, flow, systems, form…
Working at Camp Eden, an alternate Health retreat, for a year, started me on a journey from pure science to the realm of the invisible, mind, body, metaphysics and personal development. My world view cracked open.
Working with DC Kordova and Robert Kyiosaki (Money and You program) brought me to Buckminster Fuller. His work has guided my life ever since. Everything he did speaks to me…his quest to demonstrate the existence of God/ Great Spirit, his life demonstration of Integrity, his childlike passion and joy, and his commitment to the whole of Universe.
Meeting Joseph at a Dan Millman seminar opened my world to the conversation around mental illness, life, death and depression and also brought me to the work of Caroline Myss. Joseph also opened me to love.
Meeting Michele through Money and You has given me a very special friend for life, plus brought me to coaching, a vocation I had been seeking for all of my life.
Coaching brought me to so many of my beloved friends, Marcia, Cheryl, Lorraine, DJ…and into work that I truly loved. Plus it allowed me to formulate the work around Dare to Care and to really develop myself as a communicator in service to the best in people. An Amchara to others. Such a privileged path.
All along this path I have been in a constant self inquiry, choosing always to go deeper into the darkness when it shows up, rather than run from the pain. Learning, questioning, staying still, feeling, being, expanding, seeking support from others.
Running became a place for me to combine everything…silence, movement, inner work, discipline, being in nature, meeting my beast and getting to know him, learning about my body and speaking physical fluently, traveling the world to run marathons…building relationships.
Motherhood really opened my heart. There is no doubt in my mind that my daughter was to be in my life. She was conceived while I was on the birth control pill, was very much in charge of how and when she was going to be born, and then opened my heart on her arrival. And she was born an angel. Of that I am sure. My job was to simply allow this angel wings to fly, and not mess her up, because the beauty and perfection were so present. Anyone who meets her is touched by her angel. It has been a privilege to be a steward in her unfolding.
During this whole time of my life there has been a quest and hunger for more. I have wanted to engage in a much bigger conversation, and work that is global in scope. It became apparent that money and the accumulation of it was never highest on my list. Living life out loud was always the highest and service to others has become ever more important.
For years I have questioned the definition of success. What is it? And what does success mean to me?
In the beginning my definition of success was very much rooted in the material world. Money and stuff! Having lots of homes around the world, traveling first class, dressing in fabulous designer clothes. But life was teaching me a richer meaning and definition of success, and I am grateful for that. The road to finding a definition of success that truly nourishes me has not been easy. And yet it has been infinitely perfect.
At some point I arrived at a definition of success that was rooted in my choices. That for me to be successful meant that I was honouring my intuitive guidance no matter what. I was successful if I paid attention to my deepest truth, and lived by that. This still works for me and is my challenge and joy. It is certainly not the easiest road, as there are times when my ego wants something very much…like status and recognition. Or when the opportunity to make a lot of money is oh so very tempting even though I know my heart and soul would not resonate with the opportunity and my spirit would be prostituted.
Today in a conversation that moved me to such a place of deep gratitude I heard David Martin’s definition of success.
“If I end the day with friends and strangers sharing a good meal then I am a wealthy person in the world”
This week I have had many occasions to do just this. For my path has brought me to those larger conversation that I have yearned for with people that I so love being with that I can hardly stand the joy of it. There is no mistakes…in Brazil I broke bread with people who are doing incredible work world wide, and from Brazil I get to spend this week in dialogue with some of these people as we start to co-create artifacts that every fibre of my being tells me will be of such value to the world.
Jonathan Fields shared in his blog the following..
Will this choice allow me to…
Spend the greatest amount of time..
absorbed in activities and relationships that fill me up…
while surrounding myself with people I cannot get enough of, and…
earning enough to live comfortably in the world…
“while adding value comprehensively…” (my personal addition)
My definition of success therefore goes something like this..
If I honour my highest truth at all times..
and get to spend my time doing work that adds value comprehensively…
with people who demonstrate beauty, integrity, and truth in all they do,
trusting at all times in the infinite wisdom of Universe..
then I am indeed successful.
Oh joy, oh joy…how lucky am I?
2:23AM Integrity is the Essence
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