Strange as it may sound many of us are disconnected from our deepest desires. So disconnected in fact that we simply do not know what they are.
Our desires call to us in the dark..waking us at 2.23AM, wanting to be heard. Yet they are hidden behind decades of accumulated fake societal longings for superficial experiences and expectations.
We have been lead to believe our desires look like the cushy job and the corner office, the glittering spouse, the fast car’s, hot sex with many people, power, shopping at will, designer clothes, the Vogue lifestyle.
Anyone who has all of these things knows the hollowness of them. Anyone who wants all of these things is aching to feel full yet eating from a plate of empty calories.
The journey to reconnect with our true desires often takes a process of rubbish removal, allowing, receiving and letting go. It is not an easy journey. It shakes our foundation, questions our long built identity, asks of us to shed..indeed empty out.. all the noise, distractions and stuff that keep us numb from the possibility of connection to the eternal truth of our desires.
Yet I ask you…if you lived your whole life without the most ardent expression of your deepest desires…is this a life truly lived?
Or as Mary Oliver says…what are you going to do with your one wild and precious life?
To excavate our desires we first must acknowledge the rubble hiding them.
*You will never make money doing that
*You are not gifted enough to do that
*You don’t know how
*People will laugh…or judge…or…
*You spent a decade, or three…building your life and career over there…what a waste to let that go..
*The life you have planned and the one you see arriving based on pursuit of desires simply doesn’t match
*It’s too hard
*I am not worthy of that
In my own life it has taken intense inner work to first and foremost allow myself to even have desires be expressed. For many years I pursued desires that did not satisfy. The money, status, fame…glittering prizes…
Life was intent to teach me another way. It did this by taking almost everything away. Stripped bare I now had the chance to consider what I really wanted. What was true for me. What my soul most yearned to express in the world.
I have no issue with beautiful things, awards, recognition, luxury…but not as the goal. Not as the focal point of desire.
Our true desires do not fade with time, they do not wear out, need repair, lose their glitter. They are the light that enlivens us. They are the one real youth serum.
Photo credit; Christine McDougall (that would be me)
2:23AM Integrity is the Essence
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